Autoblow 2 Review: – The Top Electric & Automatic Handjob Machine?

As bad as I want to, I honestly can’t talk a bunch of shit about the AutoBlow 2 like I do some of the other toys I review. This behemoth toy is a self-driven blowjob machine with some seriously sexy features. If you haven’t yet heard of this son of a bitch, then you’ve been living under a rock and it’s about time for an eviction into the modern era.

Playing with your balls is (and always has been) a good time, but doing it by hand is sooo 1999. And while there are a ton of amazing manual masturbators on the market these days, automatic devices like the AutoBlow2 are changing the game at record speed.

Now, I won’t sit here and auto-blow smoke up your ass. This dick stick is by far not the best thing in the industry. It has some righteous competition and things are getting pretty heated between the mighty manufacturers who make the world’s most famous shit.

However, the modest price tag combined with its strength, durability, and effectiveness make the AutoBlow 2 worthy of this in-depth review. After all, it gives me an excuse to use it at my leisure and then brag about it to all you blue-balled losers.

Although it’s also not the most expensive or high-tech machine out there, it certainly works hard to accomplish what the designers had in mind when they created it – to make you jizz your fucking face off without so much as lifting a finger.

As a major contender in the International O-Face Olympics, this beautifully made bastard is churned out by a trusted brand and is designed to yank and crank until the job is done. Have I got your attention yet?

What Is the AutoBlow 2 Handjob Machine?

Not exactly the most attractive sex toy in the industry, it is, however, one of the most robust and ergonomically designed. What it lacks in appearance it more than makes up for in performance.

It has a somewhat retro presence but it’s also ultra-modern as well. With an extremely tough outer casing, the AutoBlow 2 almost looks and feels like an industrial-strength device. I don’t know about you, but that’s what the fuck I like best.

Not as sleek or fancy as some of its contenders, the AutoBlow resembles an ugly ass thermos on the outside but is a sexy motherfucker on the inside.

First of all, the textured sleeve inside the case is remarkable – soft, realistic, tantalizing, everything you’d want in a sex toy. What’s more, there are a total of 3 different sleeves that come standard with the toy and they’re all interchangeable, although sold separately.

You don’t have to be a math genius to see that there are plenty of options here if you’ve got the money.

Furthermore, this hefty throwback-like toy has a shit ton of features that are each designed to help the user customize his experience. While those features aren’t quite as high-tech as, say, the Kiiroo Keon or even the Kiiroo Onyx Plus, the AutoBlow 2 has catapulted itself into a league of its own. Not exactly suitable for long-distance sex or couple’s play, it is, however, perfect for solo acts that mean business.



The Basic Features Of Autoblow 2 Handjob Machine

Do you remember when I said that this toy comes with 3 different sleeves? Well, I might have forgotten to mention that each sleeve is not only uniquely textured but that it’s also individually sized.

Ideal for men of various lengths and girths, the AutoBlow 2 features something that it’s competition does not – extremely broad size versatility, industrial-strength durability, and surprisingly high-powered mechanics.

If I’m getting a bit too scientific for you, I apologize. It’s just that this toy inspires me to get technical like this because it reminds me of a no frills machine that was designed for the sole purpose of getting the job done, not impressing spectators like masturbation were a sport.

If, in fact, beating your meat could be considered a sport, I, for one, would use the AutoBlow 2 as my go-to equipment. Simply put: it’s not for showboating; it’s for load blowing.

Each sleeve is designed to feature an anatomically correct orifice around the opening. And while the orifice isn’t perfectly precise, it does a lot for visual stimulation either way. B

ut since the visuals will most likely be the last thing you’re thinking about while using the AutoBlow (especially when you crank it up to full speed), I figured it was important to note the efficacy of the various speed and function settings while I’m at it. You’re welcome, assholes.

A Fashionably Functional Hanjob Machine Overview

When reviewing the many functions on the AutoBlow 2, I came to realize that while there are more than enough to create a memorable experience, all the functions are still very easy to manipulate.

This was even the case during my most hot and heavy sessions with the toy on full blast. Depending on the sleeve you choose to use during your play time, the sensation options are virtually endless.

Moreover, the material used on the sleeves is surprisingly lifelike, albeit not as realistic as the Fleshlight brand’s SuperSkin. The AutoBlow 2 material has a somewhat chalky texture as opposed to a silky one, but that’s easily remedied with the use of some good old-fashioned water-based lubricant. In any event, you should already have some of that shit laying around anyway.

If not, the manufacturers of this toy throw in a small sample packet to help you get started. Isn’t that nice of them?


One thing I did notice about this toy that made it completely different from most of the other toys I’ve tried is its use of an electrical outlet. Yes, the AutoBlow 2 plugs into the wall like a throwback telephone.

However, I like to take a look at the bright side while taking a walk on the wild side. A plug in means it requires absolutely no batteries or charging, and that means you can get down to business lickety-split and stay pumping away until your dick skin peels off (if you’re into that kind of thing).

NOTE: Keep in mind that the plug on the AutoBlow 2 unit is not compatible with certain outlets, so it’s important to double check on that before you spend any money.

Vital to remember as well, this toy is by no means small or discrete. It’s large and in charge, but then again, it will probably fit into most average-sized luggage while traveling.

The size of the device is likely due to its impressive power, giving it the ability to be used hands-free when manual masturbation becomes tiring.

The power, which generates momentum for the gears that push and pull the many pleasure rings inside the case, is derived from the expertly designed motor.

I’m not bullshitting when I say that the AutoBlow 2 has a motor on it that will kick your ass. It’s guaranteed to last for at least 1,000 hours (even if continually).

Although I couldn’t go for 1,000 hours straight (because that’s 42 motherfucking days and I’m not a goddamn machine), I will say this: the hours I did spend using this toy were consistent and convenient to put it mildly.

In other words, the mechanism never lost any of its power, and the sensations only began to wane in effectiveness after my balls went numb.

Tips to Mimic My Erotic Experience

Ok, so I’m not truly a professional because I hold no actual degree, but when it comes to sex toys, I might as well be an expert. In that case, I figured I might as well give you guys some pointers to help you use your AutoBlow 2 to its fullest potential.

While some of my advice is relatively simple or obvious, some are complicated and only understood after years of masturbatory experience.

Additionally, not every man on the planet is familiar with the general operating procedures of sex toys, much less automatic blowjob robots.

Indeed, there’s a little finesse required when using shit like this for the first time, but that’s what I’m here for. So, prior to using your new AutoBlow, be sure you’re doing it right or you’ll be left with a bad impression.

And don’t wait for the manufacturer’s instructions to chaperone you through the process. They will only help you turn the machine on and off or adjust the various settings.

The only way you’re going to get the kind of experience I did is to follow these simple guidelines:

  • Place the sleeve of your choice into the case before turning it on because it’s a pain in the ass the other way around.
  • Sleeve sizes are as follows, so pick the one that best suits your dick:
    • SIZE A – 3-4 inches
    • SIZE B – 4-5 ½ inches
    • SIZE C – 5 ½ – 6 ½ inches
  • Slap on some of your favorite water-based lube before cramming your junk inside. You’ll avoid rug burn and chaffing that way; trust me.
  • Begin your session with the toy on low speed or else you’ll rip yourself off and will lose a great climax.
  • Use the highest speed setting function during the middle of your session for the most intense sensations during pre-orgasm.
  • Turn it to the humble yet powerful medium speed setting function for a rock-solid finish.
  • Be sure to clean off your toy thoroughly using warm water and a mild soap after each use to prevent bacteria growth, infection transfer, and general toy breakdown.
  • Never wash your toy while it’s plugged into the wall or else you will get shocked by more than this toy’s effectiveness.

Although I’m fully aware that each man is different when it comes to this kind of shit, I also know that general rules apply to us all. Feel free to play with your speed settings and other functions.

I’m not your boss and these are only suggestions (minus the one about not cleaning the toy while it’s plugged into the wall; I’m serious about that).

Autoblow 2 Handjob Device: The Good and the Bad

Singing the praises of the AutoBlow 2 is not difficult, but that doesn’t mean it’s perfect. Yes, I found some fault in the overall design and I plan to share them with you now. I don’t give a damn who I piss off either.

To soften the blow, I’m going to outline the good things before I fuck shit up with my list of complaints. Although everyone can appreciate a happy ending, this shit is not a fairytale.

If you buy one of these, you’ll be paying a pretty penny. I don’t know about you, but playing with my money is like playing with my emotions. I’m not here to please; I’m here to inform.

The Good

  • It features a robust motor.
  • It requires no batteries or a charger of any kind.
  • The ergonomic design of the outer casing makes is very easy to handle.
  • It can be used manually or with the hands-free option.
  • The various settings can be adjusted with ease.
  • With multiple sleeve options that vary in size, it’s easily customizable for the average Joe.
  • The sleeve comes out of the case with extreme ease, even after being pounded for hours.
  • The entire contraption is easy to clean.
  • Toy maintenance is a snap as well, with no need for special cleaners or renewal powders.

The Bad

  • It can only accommodate small to medium-sized dicks, and that can be a bad thing if your shit is longer than 6 inches.
  • The “high” speed setting is almost too intense, even for a seasoned vet like myself.
  • The lack of batteries or a portable charger make this toy very inconvenient when travelling, especially abroad.
  • It is just a tad bit too heavy for manual masturbation for some men.
  • The case design, albeit ergonomically correct, would be better if it were adjustable for individual grips.

Now, it’s obvious that the makers of the AutoBlow 2 haven’t thought of everything. Not only is the toy not compatible with any kind of Bluetooth or VR device, it’s also not made for couples and it doesn’t come with a carrying case despite the fact that it’s rather cumbersome.

However, it’s still a rock-solid machine with lots to offer, especially if you know how to use it properly.

The Indifferent

My final verdict is not created to please the makers of the AutoBlow 2, nor am I trying to sell units to you horny fucks reading this. I’m indifferent about the success of this manufacturer, the popularity of their products, or your opinion on my perspective.

The main concern here is telling the truth about a toy that hundreds of thousands of people are being talked into buying because of the company’s clever slogan, “The AutoBlow 2 is like the original massage chair for your penis.” Not a bad way to put it, boys.

Overall, I have to say that this toy is a remarkable contender in a world filled with high-tech products with dozens of bells and whistles. Without such well-appointed accoutrements, it’s very interesting to see how prevalent the AutoBlow 2 has become in the industry.

Apparently, this thing is holding its own in a big way.

Interestingly, the laid-back manufacturer recently produced a see-through AutoBlow 2 VIP model (reminiscent of the Fleshlight Ice), which is designed for all the avid voyeurs out there.

And since the VIP is self-driven and powered by a motor instead of a battery, it blows the Fleshlight version clear out of the water (no pun intended). With a price tag that’s comparable to the lower-end toys on today’s market, I feel as though the makers are some serious charitable people.



My Judgment Call On The Autoblow 2 Handjob Machine

I suppose you’d like me to wrap this shit up and give you the lowdown on how I really feel about the AutoBlow 2. With far more PROS than CONS and a reputation that precedes it, this toy is likely to become one of the industry’s most beloved standards.

Although it’s not very discrete, nor is it hot looking, I’ve come to realize that a lot of the best shit in life is disguised the same way.

If I had to give this shit some sort of rating to help quantify my feelings for it, I would probably do a piss-poor job at it. I usually go with the standard 1 through 10-style scale but the AutoBlow 2 is, as I said, in a league of its own.

With that being said, I think I’ll use a simple 1 through 5-style scale to keep things simple for that ass. Again, you’re welcome.

So, without further ado, I give you my humble opinion of the AutoBlow 2 (and the AutoBlow 2 VIP), as they compare to other automatic blowjob machines without a ton of bells and whistles like Bluetooth and VR content.

On a scale of 1 to 5, this shit gets a solid 4. I won’t lie; I’d like to see what else the designers come up with that can make the famous Fleshlight brand shake in its high-priced boots.

You can find out more information or buy autoblow 2 at their official website.